How do you react?
As you continue to practice the self-talk that we spoke about last week, you will become an expert at self- directed speech- talking to yourself, so that you can assess what you are doing right and how you can improve.
Taking this a step further is to notice the emotions that are coming up for you as you practice this.
In the example we used last time, Bob used his mistakes in painting to motivate himself to be more deliberate and careful in his actions in the future. Our emotions can also derail us. We may start a project, notice the areas we need to improve and get overwhelmed and shut down.
Noticing our emotions can give us the ability to reset and refocus.
Picture a toddler building a tower of blocks. They have spent the last few minutes stacking blocks one on top of the other until the whole thing crashes. How does a two year old react in the face of “failure”?
Often, you will find the child giddy with excitement!
And what is their response?
Start building all over again!
Now take the scenario of the toddler, but put a teenager in their place. The teen is tasked with using blocks to build the highest tower that they can. They are gingerly placing blocks one on top of the other, when suddenly the whole thing comes crashing down.
How does this teenager react?
He may feel the frustration rising in his chest, and say to himself “This is not possible, I stacked these as carefully as I could, and they still fell. I give up!”
He can recognize the feelings that he is experiencing as emotions that can take him down or build him up. These feelings may make him give up, but he isn’t one to give up easily. He is going to use this experience to propel himself forward and do better next time. He says to himself, “I tried and they fell. What didn’t work that I can change going forward?” Using the emotions as a motivator to propel himself towards success.
Notice your emotions: What do you feel in your chest? In your arms, legs, all over?
How can you react positively? Negatively? Which do you choose?
Let me know what came up for you in this exercise!